Why I Haven’t Called the Police: A Personal Reflection on Trust and Safety

There’s a question that weighs heavily on my mind: Why haven’t I called the police? It’s a simple enough question, but the answer is anything but straightforward. The truth is, calling the police has not been an option for me—at least not in the way that most people might think. The simple act of reaching out for help has, on more than one occasion, turned into an experience that left me feeling more victimized than protected. Firstly, my phone is being monitored, and I have reason to believe that whoever is watching me so closely may have individuals within law enforcement working on their behalf. This unsettling thought has become harder to ignore with each passing day. The idea that my every move and conversation might be under surveillance, and that some within the very system that is supposed to protect me could be involved, is deeply troubling. It raises serious questions about privacy, security, and the integrity of those in positions of power. You might be wondering why I’d feel this way. The reason is that, in my case, the police haven’t been the ones to offer help or comfort. Instead, on two separate occasions, I found myself treated as the perpetrator rather than the victim. That feeling of being misjudged, misunderstood, and even targeted by those who should be sworn to protect is not something easily forgotten. It's shaped my relationship with law enforcement in a way that many people can't comprehend. The First Incident: California—A Disturbing Encounter with an Informant The first incident took place while I was living in California. I had an encounter with someone who, in retrospect, I now believe was a confidential informant. I called the police, expecting them to help resolve the situation, but the outcome was far from what I had hoped for. Instead of being met with understanding, I found myself treated as though I was the one in the wrong. A female officer was assigned to the case, and each time she showed up, I was met with suspicion rather than support. The atmosphere was tense, and I could feel the shift in the way she viewed me—like I was the one who had done something wrong. It escalated to a point where I felt threatened—I had to hold on to my baby just to make sure the officer didn’t shoot me. It was a moment of pure fear. I wasn’t the aggressor. I wasn’t a criminal. But in that moment, I was treated as though I was. And in the back of my mind, I couldn’t help but wonder: How many others have had this same experience? How many people have been wrongfully targeted, misjudged, or treated as though they are guilty of something they didn’t do? The Second Incident: Garner, North Carolina—False Allegations and Harassment The second incident took place while I was living in Garner, North Carolina. A similar pattern unfolded: I found myself once again made into the perpetrator when I called for help. This time, the situation escalated further. CPS attempted to separate me from my son, we then placed into a hotel by CPS, left stranded, and subjected to the constant harassment of Child Protective Services (CPS). I felt trapped—like my every move was being scrutinized, and no matter what I said, I wasn’t going to be seen as the innocent party. But it didn’t stop there. They even tried to commit me to a mental institution, a tactic that many of us know is sometimes used to silence or discredit someone. It’s something that those who have been through it will never forget—the way a system meant to protect can instead be used to imprison and isolate you. The Real Reason Behind My Distrust of Law Enforcement After these two incidents, how could I possibly trust the police? After all, in both situations, I was the one who sought help. In both situations, I expected the police to do their job—to protect me and my family. Instead, I was made to feel like a suspect, even when I was the one being victimized. The truth is, I have a deep distrust in law enforcement now, and it’s not something that can be easily overcome. When your experiences with the police leave you feeling like you’re constantly under suspicion, constantly fighting to prove your innocence, the natural response is to pull back, to hesitate before picking up the phone and dialing 911. Why would I call the police if I know that I may just become the one who is blamed for something I didn’t do?